Fish looking for the Ocean…

Fish looking for Ocean

I heard this story about a fish. He swims up to an older fish and says: “I’m trying to find this thing they call the ocean.

The ocean?” the older fish says, “that’s what you’re in right now.

This”, says the young fish, “this is water. What I want is the ocean!

-Soul

We are running to get life, while life is running away!

-Anon

It’s the People…

It’s the People

People are the foundation of any company’s success. The primary job of each manager is to help people be more effective in their job and to grow and develop. We have great people who want to do well, are capable of doing great things, and come to work fired up to do them. Great people flourish in an environment that liberates and amplifies that energy. Managers create this environment through support, respect, and trust. 

Support means giving people the tools, information, training, and coaching they need to succeed. It means continuous effort to develop people’s skills. Great managers help people excel and grow. 

Respect means understanding people’s unique career goals and being sensitive to their life choices. It means helping people achieve these career goals in a way that’s consistent with the needs of the company. 

Trust means freeing people to do their jobs and to make decisions. It means knowing people want to do well and believing that they will.

— Trillion Dollar Coach

Why be happy only 10% of our lifetime?

Small things in life.

Why be happy only for the big moments in life?

Why can’t we be happier, laugh more and make merry for the smaller moments?  Why can’t we lower our bar to get excited and be happier about the small things?

If we divide life into two parts :-

The first part – Smaller, daily, or routine things that happen. It constitutes 90% of our lifetime. Smaller things like:- 

A casual laugh with friends.

An emotional smile with your other half.

The tasty food.

Smell of Coffee.

Sunlight in your face.

Playing with your kids.

Helping others sometime going out of way.

Play games with your family & friends.

These smaller moments happen almost daily and frequently but we choose to either ignore it or bypass it watching in a drunken stupor looking something beyond them…something bigger, holding ourselves back for the big moment to come.

Second part – Bigger, larger life events that happen. It constitutes 10% of our lifetime. Bigger events like:–

Got selected into a good job.

Got your salary hike.

Bought something new and bigger than your neighbours. A car, A house.

Travel to some exotic place.

There may be more, but the above does not happen more than 15-20 times in our lifetime.

So why depend on these bigger moments that are rare to make us happier and keep waiting?

Sure we should strive for the bigger moments but if we are happier with the smaller things in life i.e the 90% part, these 10% will automatically be with us.

This is the reason children are happier most of the time as they are happy and excited about smaller things in life.

So smile 🙂 ! Be happy and be excited for the next small thing that is coming your way today.

Let’s stop setting Goals…

Why we set up Goals? A simple answer is to be successful. If you are a sports-person winning the sport. If an entrepreneur then achieving a revenue level or key metrics.  And if a student aiming to excel in exams to get a good career.

At the same time, I am sure our fellow sports-person, business competitors, or classmates are also setting similar goals.

But only a few of us achieves these goals.  So what differentiates between setting Goals and achieving them –

The Systems(Process) is the differentiator, which we build consistently not Goals.

Here are few problems with setting Goals:

Winners and losers have the same Goals

Every Olympian participating wants to win gold, but only a few wins it. Every candidate wants to get a good job. And if successful and unsuccessful people share the same goals, then the goal by itself cannot be the differentiating factor between the winner and the losers.

It’s with the systems, the process that makes winners achieve their goals.

Achieving the goal brings only a momentary change

Imagine you worked hard and got your dream job, but after joining you got complacent in the job. As your performance drops, you start feeling frustrated and if you don’t mend ways soon you may have to leave the job.

Achieving the goal only changes our life momentarily. Maintaining that level or as we aspire more we need to be always performing or learning at that level, in fact, keep increasing our bar.

So Goal even if its achieved, is temporary, not a long-term achievement. 

Goal restricts our happiness and limits motivation

Once I reach my goal, then I’ll be happy. The problem with a goals-first mentality is that you’re continually putting happiness off until the next milestone. 

In this case happiness was always something for future self to enjoy. 

When all the hard work is focused on a particular goal, motivation to keep working hard drops once we achieve it. Whereas in life there is always the next level of aspirations.

If we enjoy the systems, the process we will be much happier and will be consistently achieving success.

Goals without Systems makes us dependent on luck

Without proper systems, we may achieve a goal or may not there is no surety. In the end, it’s about performance but unless we are sure about ourselves, it’s left to chance. Mentally it is accounted as being lucky if we achieve the goal or unlucky if not.

Edison’s failed 10,000 times before perfecting his electric bulb, do you think he was dependent on luck or goal setting? If he would not have followed the process diligently, again and again, it’s not possible to achieve such a feat.

Even luck favours Systems and Consistent hard work. 

So enjoy the process, build the systems and don’t worry about goals, it will follow you around.

Why I stopped reading self-help books…

No matter how many self-help and motivation books I read if things do not move as planned the feeling of despair creeps in.

But if we look at it closely things rarely move as per plan for anyone, it’s either good or bad based on our perception of the situation.  

In the end, nothing is as good as it seems or as bad as it seems. And the feeling of despair will go away as the new day comes.

So whenever the feeling comes in I remember this quote from Gita:

Whatever happened, happened for the good. Whatever is happening, is happening for the good. Whatever will happen, will also happen for the good.

– Bhagavad Gita

Asking for help is strength, not weakness…

Despite what you might think, expressing vulnerability and asking for help, clarification, or input can be a sign of strength and confidence, not weakness.

It requires confidence  to acknowledge the short comings. Whereas one who is waiting to solve everything by oneself is indulging on ego and insecurity.

So don’t worry and go ask for help…

Let’s be honest, learning isn’t fun…

Learning is hard

Learning is hard, it requires self-discipline to learn. But its a misconception today that learning should be fun & interesting and if it’s not fun, skip it and move on to something different. In fact, this is a big problem for the coming generation as they misconstrue that learning can only be when it’s interesting.

Whereas we know that initial attraction to a subject or activity is very different from actual learning. Actual learning requires hard work, self-discipline, and a lot of patience.

Learn what you are interested in, really?

As a student, if we only learn what we are interested in then we will never learn anything. Think about it, what have you learned in Maths? Guitar? any Subjects? unless you are pushed to learn, practice & kept working on it on regular basis.

Yes, the initial attraction may help to jump into it mainly because we get motivated by seeing toppers, seniors(parents), or successful people in that field but that’s just the first attraction, as soon as we dive in, if we don’t endure hard work and be patient we cannot learn & succeed.

As the saying goes

All “overnight” successes take 10 years of learning

– Jeff buzos

Yes, there are rare individuals (Gifted ones) who are born with deep interests in one area but still if they do not pursue it with willpower, they haven’t been successful. 

Another problem with “Learning what you are interested in”, is that our interest changes as we grow. It changes based on our environment, surroundings, and peers.

So if I truely follow my interests, I will not learning anything, as interests keeps changing.

Even kids today get too many choices in school. Today an eleven-year-old student is given many different options to choose from, Chess, Guitar (or any musical instrument), Cricket, Gymnastics, whatnot, you name it and it’s available in schools. Are they able to learn? Nope. Because of initial dabbling, they know a bit but couldn’t learn or perform it even to a basic level. 

Once the kid crosses an age, by giving choices and allow switching between them they develop the tendency to shift goals as soon as the hard part of learning starts. These choices and switching, also lead to Attention deficit, they cannot focus on one single thing for long.

I would rather that today’s schools let them focus on one thing and teach them to learn the subject or activity at a much deeper level. And be honest with them that learning isn’t fun.

When you know how to learn one thing, then you get good at learning, which goes a long way in life to achieve success.

The most successful people in the world are always lifelong learners. They fully understand that their level of education directly determines their quality of life.

-Jim Rohn

So what we can do as a student (If want to learn) or teacher, parent, or seniors guiding kids to learn?

Do lot of research on what you want to learn and why:

Before choosing any activity or subject understand what drives you and how it can be achieved by taking this path, do a lot of introspection. Do research on the subject or topic, the best part is in today’s digital era it’s easier to find a lot of details about any topics and then choose.

The end goal is to understand what you will achieve or envisage what you will become if you go down this path. In fact, this also helps keep us motivated to follow the path.

For kids, parents/teachers can help them envisage their dreams. Also what & how they want to do way forward and decide.

Apply brain as well as heart before choosing to learn.

Talk to seniors/experts in that field if possible:

Talk to seniors, teachers, or relatives who have already achieved a level and understand from them. What they feel after going thru the journey in this field? That will help you in deciding whether it suits you or not.

Once decided don’t switch or allow switching:

Learning anything big or small will have hurdles and need hard work, but unless we cross them we will not learn. Also apart from the subject or topic, the biggest learning is “How to learn”, which is very different for every individual, there is no set path. But continuous learning is the most important skill you need to develop for a successful life.

Environment impacts a lot:

Lastly get a good Mentor & Peers who are learning the same, this is the biggest reason to get into a good college, school, or community which has a renowned faculty and environment for that subject or activity. Moreover, this gives you a social nudge (Peers, Collagaes) to be motivated and keep learning and growing in the chosen field.

Follow a routine for learning:

Set a daily routine to learn, study, and practice. This will help make learning much easier than just random bouts of learning doses. Make it a habit, so that at later stages, if you want to learn something similar, you can just replace the current subject with a new one and fit into that habit…

Overall Learning is critical for achieving success, happiness, and freedom in life. So let’s ensure we learn “how to learn” and impart our coming generation(s) how to learn the best way possible.

Always remember:

“Whatever advancements happen the way of learning will be the same” 

Anonymous